Including my boyfriend.
We’re been dating for a little over 3 months and it’s safe to say we’ve had a great “honeymoon” period. We’ve spent A LOT of time together these past 3 months – which is extra impressive because we live 100 miles apart. I’ve sacrificed a lot to see him as much as I do. However essentially gaining 8 pounds since we’ve been dating is not cutting it. I am not willing to sacrifice the year of work I put in taking off 42 pounds and I still want to lost ~25 pounds. Plus I know that weight loss and maintenance is a FOREVER commitment.
I signed up for that half marathon in April and I am NOT ready for it. I CAN be, but I have to WORK WORK WORK for it. I need to train. I need to be running 5 days a week and I need to eat as cleanly as possible, NO CHEATING AT ALL.
I keep thinking about this post I wrote in October:
Sunday, October 10, 2010
3 Hour Throwdown
Days like today I’m actually thankful I don’t have a significant other or kids. I spent 3 hours today exercising. I ran 5 miles to the gym – in 90 degree weather mind you despite the fact that we had a cold snap last week. Then did an hour of yoga at the gym and ran 5 miles back home.
3 hours of just exercise and I love it. It made me really think about kicking into full marathon training gear because I have the time for it.
I remember thinking how hard it must be to balance a significant other or a family WHILE trying to lose weight and how having time was a perk of being young and single. Running was my boyfriend…haha.
Now here I am trying to balance my time between things I love – running and my boyfriend. I should also mention my friends and me time – I’ve not given enough time to those things either recently.
I’ve seen him EVERY weekend in 2011, which is great, but not healthy or balanced. Today I decided that instead of spending this weekend with him, I am spending it on focusing myself. I am going to work on my running/social plans/schedule, get outside and run, prep some meals, see my friends, sleep, catch up on tivo and laundry. Am I going to miss him? Yes, but I need to make time for all the other things I love too. I need to work on balance.
Here’s part of an email I wrote him (I often express how I really feel better in written words than out loud- I blame all my blogging) I’ve never hid
anything much from you guys, so why start now.
I could so easily get wrapped up entirely in you – and sometimes that’s exactly what I want. It’s crazy how different my life is now. For YEARS my weekends were all about me, my wants and my schedule. For many of those years I was lazy or slept too much or drank too much or shopped too much – but in 2010 I got a handle on my life and so much of it came from diet and exercise. I know that you don’t really understand, but it’s more than how I look. It’s how I feel. It’s having control. It’s challenging myself and pushing my limits. It’s knowing that I’m working harder than most people. It’s that I’m making the hard choice to be healthy. I have never felt more confident or in control of my life when I was training for and running those half marathons in October. However it’s hard to keep up with the training and lifestyle that it takes to be in an elite class of runners. It was a daily challenge when it was just me.
Now that you’re in the mix it’s hard. It’s hard for me to put off getting to see you because I have to go run. Or for me to leave you for an hour or so to go run. It’s hard to not want to have a glass of wine with you or resist all the delicious food you cook. It’s funny you always say you are a hungry guy and you love food and I can SO relate, but I spent last year sacrificing my love of food for running. I wouldnt have ANYTHING bad in the house because it’s so hard for me to resist temptation. However I don’t regret any of the sacrifices I’ve made for running – it is worth it and I know that. I hate that I have to sacrifice some time with you, but it’s how it has to be, how I need it to be.
He handled my email well “I told you from the beginning that I am your number one fan and will always support your choices and decisions. So whatever that means you need me to do, I will.”
So I outlined for him what my plans are:
I guess the best way for you to support and encourage me is to understand my plans – what I have done in the past and what works for me
*Run/exercise 4-5x a week. Even if that means leaving you on the couch, or not coming to see you until later – you maybe even have to push me out of the bed to go, but I want you too.
*I am also going to cut back on my drinking. Only drink alcohol 1x a week – no casual beer or wine here and there anymore for me – or if i do it’s all i get for the week.
*No soda at all.
*I may bring my own breakfast/lunch foods to your place or cook 2 different things when you are here. I generally eat oatmeal and yogurt with fruit in the morning. a turkey sandwich thin midday. lunch, a pre/post gym protein snack, dinner.
*I also need to cut back dramatically on sugars (sweets, carbs)
*No eating after 9pm
I know this may sound crazy to you, but it’s what I stuck to last year and what I’d like to keep up this year too. I know that you love me no matter what I look like, but I really want nothing more than to be HEALHTY – physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually. I need to make sure I’m working on all those areas. Physical health will aid to my mental and emotional health. I’m not asking you to understand, but I’m happy I have you as my number 1 cheerleader.
He’s so wonderful and I am so happy, but I know that I could be so much more happy if I had my fitness and nutrition where it once was in addition to balance overall.
I would much appreciate any advice from those of you that are successfully (or at least trying to be successful) balancing your fitness with your significant other and your life in general.