Warning: My Opinion on/Experience with Gastric Bypass
This week there has been some buzz about gastric bypass on here and I guess picking up where I left off last week when I was blogging about my dad.
He had the surgery at a private, outpatient hospital that pretty much only did gastric bypass and lapband surgery in Dallas. The surgery itself was OK, but the aftercare or LACK THERE OF was what lead to his death. His surgery was on Thursday, November 15, 2007 and he died Sunday, November 18, 2007 – there was ample time to save him. He essentially slowly bled internally to death.
He had the surgery Thursday morning and was supposed to be released Friday. I should mention I wasn’t at the hospital until after he died. He didn’t think I needed to be down there for the surgery, he had his friends that were going to take care of him after surgery. He downplayed everything and I truly regret not going to the hospital at any point in time and making demands – however I was naive to so much of the situation and blaming myself isn’t going to solve anything.
Anyway surgery was Thursday, he was supposed to be released Friday. Well his stats were low/not as strong as they should have been (medical jargon is not my strong suit). So the hospital decided to keep him another day. Well Saturday they were about to RELEASE HIM when one of his friends noticed that his incisions were STILL bleeding through the gauze and that my dad really shouldn’t go home like that. So they re-admitted/didn’t finish releasing him and he stayed in the hospital on Saturday. I talked to him both Thursday and Saturday and there was a MAJOR difference. It was scary, but he said it was just the meds that were making him sound so tired and weak. I will never forgot how his voice sounded. We talked briefly and told each other that we loved one another and how I was excited to come down on Tuesday and see him (I had been planning to come all along on Tuesday night to hang out with him before flying to NY on Wednesday for Thanksgiving that year). I had A LOT of trouble sleeping that night.
Sunday morning 6:30am my phone rings. I knew before I answered the phone that he was dead. I was devastated, I still am. My whole entire world forever changed.
A friend drives me the 2.5 hours to Dallas because I am in no condition to drive – I didn’t cry much, I was tooo in shock. I was just numb. I get to the hospital and meet up with my dad’s friends about 11am and to my HORROR he was still in his room (I did not see him, I didn’t want to see him like that). This JOKE of a hospital didn’t have a morgue or anything. They just left him there. :::BLIND RAGE:::
Here I am 24 years old and in charge. I am talking with all my family 1,000 miles away in NY and being the person making decisions about how to proceed. And I’m just SCREAMING at hospital staff. His “cause of death” from the coroner (WHO CALLS IN CAUSES OF DEATH OVER THE PHONE – IN TEXAS AT LEAST) was heart failure. UMMMMM yes generally EVERYONE’s cause of death is literally heart failure. You’re heart stops = you die. BUT WHAT LED TO THE HEART FAILURE. The Dallas coroner office refuses to do an autopsy so we decided to do our own private one in New York. FYI – an autopsy in the state of New York is about $18,000.
The funeral home in New York that we used (WHO WERE WONDERFUL) worked with another Dallas funeral home to get my dad to a morgue and get him flown to New York.
We come to find out that my dad’s true cause of death, was that he bled to death. He lost 2 LITERS OF BLOOD – that’s a whole soda bottle. He died slowly and to my understanding felt no pain, but it was COMPLETELY preventable. The sutures from the surgery weren’t properly closed up and initially all that needed to be done was go in and fix the problem. Even just a few hours before his death he could have been saved with a blood transfusion. BAYLOR FREAKIN HOSPITAL was less than a mile away. This joke of a private hospital that doesn’t have that type of equipment could have easily transferred him there. NEGLIGENCE in his aftercare.
Before you ask. Yes we tried to sue. However the state of Texas is a corrupt bag of shit thanks mostly to George W. Bush. I really don’t want to get started on lawsuit stuff. It was a terrible 2 year ordeal that honestly just left me extra angry with hospitals, doctors, lawyers and Texas.
My daddy didn’t need that surgery. My daddy didn’t need to die. Sadly he did, but I refuse to let my weight control my life. To quote a message I got from @milfitude a while back and saved:
Sometimes it takes the death of a loved one to wake us up. I consider that a lasting gift from my mother.
I found such comfort and hope in those words. And here I am 3 years later and in the best place in my life thus far. I thank my father for that lasting gift no matter how painful it’s been. I only wish he was here to see me now and the wonderful all-around person I am today.
Tomorrow I plan on celebrating my dad’s life on here. Today I will cry, but tomorrow I will celebrate and smile.
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