Thinking of this guy who I lost 10+ years ago following complications after gastric bypass surgery.
Losing him when he was 58 and I was 24 turned my world upside-down. When I was in high school he lost 100 lbs naturally and kept it off for ~8 years, but once he retired and his routine changed he put weight back on. At 6’2 ~300 lbs he purposefully put on some weight to qualify for the surgery.
He originally planned for lap band, but about a week prior to surgery he opted for gastric bypass as a more permanent solution.
His surgery was the Thursday before Thanksgiving, I saw him the Sunday before since we were both living in North Texas at the time. He wasn’t scared so I was scared. I was planning to see him a few days after his surgery so he told me not to drive the 2.5 hours down for surgery. He got through surgery and was supposed to be released from the clinic the next day, but they kept him another night, and then another night. I should have known something was wrong, but I was a 24 year old idiot. I spoke to him Saturday afternoon on the phone, he didn’t sound right, but again no one nor my gut told me to come. His surgery incision wasn’t healing properly. Sunday morning, November 18, 2007 I get the hysterical 6AM phone call that he’s dead.
Shock. Anger. Sadness. Regret. Sadness. Anger.
That first year or so after he died was such blur, we tried to sue the hospital for negligence, but ran into good old boys club type roadblocks. The autopsy we had done in NY concluded that he died of internal bleeding, totally preventable or treatable with a blood transfusion.
To me surgery is not a option ever. I have always had a mistrust of doctors after my mom’s dad also died due to routine surgery and post op negligence (in that case my grandmother won the lawsuit and 2 doctors lost their licenses).
In Jan 2010 I knew I wanted to never have to consider an elective surgery so I starting running, slowly, but surely I got control of my life and my health. I’ve had some slip ups over the years, but at the end of the day me living a healthy life is my tribute to my Dad.
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