Tag: MLstress

I’m still reading “The Drama of the Gifted Child.” It’s only 125 pages, but it’s a tough read. This passage really spoke to me today and I thought it was appropriate to share.
.
Dread.
.
Yes, that perfectly sums up how I feeL towards my Mom. I never know who I’m going to get Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde. The stress of even worrying about it makes it almost unbearable before I’m in the same room with her.
.
This year I will be NY for Thanksgiving, but I do not plan to see my Mom. She has rescinded too many invitations over the last few years and I can’t let the dread of seeing her ruin my precious few days off in my favorite city.
I hope I can stay strong and not let guilt take over, this is in best interest of my self care.

This is a picture of me right now. Seriously.
I want to share the good and the bad here. I’ve put on 10 lbs since 7/27 and almost left Body Combat in the middle of class because I could FEEL those 10 lbs jiggling on my body making everything seem so much harder. I finished out the class and I’m glad I did. Thankfully my busiest season of work officially wraps up on Friday after an especially grueling Sun-Tues this week.
I know I will get back in the groove now that vacation, Birthday, and final push of a busy work season are behind me, but I still feel like a failure. Like I caught a beautiful butterfly that I lost time and time again and swore I wouldn’t let it getaway, but then I did. I know weight loss and fitness is a series of falling down and getting back up. I’m just wallowing in the moment and I thought it was important to share my human imperfection because it’s real.
#failure #human #weightlossjourney #fitnessjourney #real #recovery #selfcare #balance #alignment

Travel Fail

Greetings from hour two at Dulles airport waiting on my flight to Raleigh.

I planned a secret trip to surprise my good friend A for her birthday. Originally I thought I had my urban hiking class this week and so I wasn’t going to be able to partake in birthday activities but when I realized I didn’t have class I coordinated with some of my friends who were planning to go down to Raleigh. They all were leaving yesterday and driving down but I couldn’t make it so I booked a one-way flight for this morning and then the plan is to drive back with the girls tomorrow. I’m just annoyed because it was an early morning and I was hoping to spend the whole day with them today.

I left my house at 6:40 this morning to take a lyft to the airport and was running early for my first time ever but my 8:25 flight keeps getting delayed due to fog so I’m looking at a 10:45 departure time. The flight itself is just over an hour and I’m looking at 2 ½ hours worth of delay so stupid!!! Uggghhhh.

I’m currently voice to texting this post as I’m power walking in airport getting steps in! I also plan to whip out my hair straightener in the bathroom and do my hair since it looks like I will have to meet folks at lunch straight from the airport as opposed to stopping at my friends place first.

I was so excited about this fun surprise and making the decision to book a one-way flight but ultimately it would’ve been faster to drive down there at this point. Boo hissssss

UPDATE: after 3 hours at the airport my flight got cancelled and they wouldn’t have been able to rebook me until tonight so I demanded a refund and I’m heading home. FaceTimed with the birthday girl to deliver the sad news ?

Bad News

2 terrible phones calls in 1 hour

  • Best Friend’s dad collapsed at home and was barely responsive when medics arrived. Getting her hysterical phone call when she was driving there in winter weather was gut-wrenching. Been texting with her husband, but I don’t know much right now. 
  • Vet called, after some bloodwork Fred likely has Cushing’s Disease. Need to take him in for an ultrasound on Friday to figure out more.

Thoughts and prayers are much appreciated 

Update: Bestie’s dad who I lovingly referred to as “Thundercat” passed away. Likely heading up to Boston this weekend :’(

Ragged

It’s the final stretch, but I am spent after nearly 3 months of running my office solo. So many competing priorities and deadlines in an environment still “new” to me. 

It’s mile 22 of a marathon. There isn’t that much further to go, but what’s left is going to hurt and take sheer willpower. 

I’ll go from the only full time person and 3 10/hr week students to 2 full time people, 3 full time grad students, and 3 full time students come May 15th. 

Girly Overload

Between wedding planning and now home remodeling I’m getting sucked into a vortex of things I’ve actively tried to not care about ever.

Today we met with a design/renovation husband and wife team that came recommended by neighbors. I was basically like I have no vision, I just want it function, to flow, and to not be an eyesore like our current outdated kitchen and bath. When asked about our style I was like ummmm we’re going for a beachy vibe, despite not being near a beach or major body of water…

I’ve never been a “girly-girl” and I never spent time dreaming about weddings or homes. So of this upcoming planning is going to test my will for sure!

But at the end of the day I’ll be married to my guy and have a beautiful new kitchen and master bath so it’s worth. Oh and I’ll be broke haha.

Woooosaaaaa

Seriously who wants to be my wedding planner and project manage my remodel…

Metro Madness

I took the metro to work this morning since T took off and is picking me up in a little while to head to the beach (Ocean City, MD). I’ve never been on the metro during rush hour and thankfully today was Friday so it wasn’t as bad as I imagined it to be. I only had my lunch bag and purse with me, but I still felt cramped or like I was taking up too much room. 

After like 11 stops I got off to take a bus, except I couldn’t find the bus stop – not true I found it, but no buses came for like 30 min. So I went back on the metro to a different line and took it 5 stops and then took a campus shuttle to work. It took me almost 2 hours AKA double my drive time to get to work. 

The good news is that I logged like 1.5 miles and 15 flights of stairs during the mayhem. Plus today most of my office is out and I didn’t have any meetings, so me rolling in hideously late wasn’t unbearable.

Today made me realize I don’t hate my ~55min commute as much as I thought I did.  

Work Out, Balance Out

In times of transition or “chaos” I have always found comfort in working out these past 6 years that I’ve been living that fit life (haha).

Thursday is my last day of work here, new job starts Monday, thinking of moving jobs/offices, moving houses, and all the details and planning that come with. 

I have been seeking out time to run/work out/even walk just to get away from planning/thinking/feeling like I’m wasting time. 

When I’m working out that is all I can really do. I can think, sure, but if I don’t have a pen to write down a thought or make a list it’s kind of moot for me during stressful times. I commit fully to the workout and let my mind take a break (which sometimes it can’t even do when I’m supposed to be sleeping).

Last week I got Body Pump in and a few runs/walks.

Since Sunday I’ve gotten a run in, walked, went to yoga, Body Pump, and plan on going to 2 more Body Pump classes and getting a run and/or bike ride in when I’m “off” on Friday. 

Wooosaaaa